The 7. Day

It looks like there won't be such need to have a particular event to do every day. It is enough to be prepared with ideas if we have a few hours on our hands. I also find it useful to have a few things readily available in my backpack. Here is my list:

1. A few dvds 
Especially if you are off for a weekend together.

2. A book / magazine / newspaper
I make sure he always has something to read as he tends to read a lot.

3. A book I read to S. or he reads to me
We have a habit of reading books or parts of books out loud to each other. We are reading Edward Albee's Who is Afraid of Virginia Woolf? which we love and laugh at so much. A brilliant play.

4. Something creative to do together
At the moment we are working on creating a website, so I have some sketches of the website pages. Also, we have some ideas / drawings / sketches of jewellery we plan to create together.

Doing something creative together can work wonders. Whether you are trying to quit or just want to have fun and feel good, too.

And most importantly:

5. Paying 100% attention to him
This needs to be in my head, not in my backpack, you silly. This is most important of all. And easiest to forget. And most difficult to follow through. I need to pay even more attention to him than usual and be even more prepared to talk, entertain, change plans, etc. These days, weeks, months cannot be about my petty little hissy fits. No being jealous. I must not be selfish.

It's not about me. I am not the star of the show. He is. Must keep this in mind. All the time.

xxxxx

It pretty great that S. is very open about the whole thing, we talk about the quitting process every day. Most of the time it is he who brings up the subject. He informs me about what it's like and how he is doing. It's a bit like talking about sex. I think a lot of people don't talk about sex (not really seriously, earnestly), so when we do, I feel a bit like being part of a secret society, a minority that is open about this amazingly important topic.

xxxxx

Later today we are off to see some friends and will spend most of the day with them. See how that goes. One step at a time.

I am grateful for such a brave man.